Today, found out our agency voted best-dressed detectives 2016 with the exception of one person.
As I was removing the newspapers from in front of the office door, a woman came by. Attractive, I’d say. Potentially elegant but fear seemed to be making her movements ungraceful. She left and came back a few times. Finally I said: ‘Detective Pennybright is missing and we don’t know when he’ll return.” She didn’t seem surprised. As she went down the stairs, I heard hissing sounds.
This is Clarence Clavicle again, DPB’s neighbour.
Thank you for the opportunity.
I am concerned that Detective Pennybright is leaving more clues than finding them. The newspapers on doorstep, overflowing mailbox, Christmas decorations …
I am reading up on detective work, in case I am forced to step in during his absence.
1/ start new cases on new moon
2/ stop using full sentences stop
3/ leave false clues (flight information, etc)
4/ do not get attached to case. let go, once solved
5/ exercise your capabilities of descending to the heights of profound pettiness
6/ petty criminals is an oxymoron
(library closing now)
Thank you for this opportunity. CC
found Mr. XX with the help of k9-agent Gwyllym. second floor above pawn shop. his job is coming up with restrictions and bylaws to spoil fun. i congratulated him. then i sat in the chair opposite and stared at him. didn’t say anything for 15 minutes. that did the trick. i could smell his fear. k9-agent G enjoyed stale pizza. level 2 in a few days.
hope office not fallen apart in my absinthe.
event: ‘yes, that is definitely the Chief’s cologne’
location: stairwell 13
detected by: agent OKK9 Gwyllym
action: running and barking, no discovery
that is a lame excuse. (DPB)
but still missing.
thank you for this opportunity, CC.
i never answer a knock. anything else is bad manners. (DPB)
i am stepping in until we find the Detective. My name is Clayton Clavicle and let any inaccuracies be on me. I am being a good neighbour. i can tell you these things:
he is awoken by the crack of dawn.
he is sensitive to mustard.
thank you for this opportunity. CC